In Loving Memory

 

In Loving Memory ofDad

 

Dad 2006 birthday

My dad came to Malaysia at a tender age of about 10 from China by sea. He once told me of how he had fallen into the water unnoticed from the ship and was rescued upon discovery by a sailor thereafter. Unfortunately, little else is known to me of his early days except for the times we shared together.

 

Dad was strict with us, his children (6 + 1 [adopted] sons and 2 daughters). We developed a certain fear of him especially when he was angry. But his punishments were infrequent and were not as severe as what we made it out to be. Generally he expressed his love for us in his own ways. When he was endowed, he was generous and would bring home his catch or buy us some quality fish from the market. He provided for us although we knew his earnings were not much. We had a good house (big wooden house) to stay and were never hungry because the vegetables mum planted were able to earn us income for our sustenance and the farm poultry provided us occasional dishes of meat.

Dad was not formally educated but he taught himself to read, was well read (examples: Chinese novels like the Three Kingdom) and  kept up to date with events and happenings from reading the Chinese dailies. He took a positive approach to life, always believing in himself and proud of his family.

His initial ventures into business did not take off successfully but his opening of a Bak Kut Teh restaurant paid off handsomely with patrons coming from far away places like Singapore just to savour his delicious cooking. His business flourished and he was able to pass it on to my younger brother who later invited other siblings to join in the business. All in all there are now three brothers and one sister running their own BKT business, learning the trade from dad. My friend Kiam Hann who knew a part of dad’s business history told me that dad was well liked by his friends who encouraged him to start the business and supported it from the opening. This is his legacy – Teo Chew BKT is now well known in Malacca and in KL (when Kim Haw decided to open his restaurant, he named it after father, He Teck BKT).

Dad had an illustrious life even before this, having travelled and worked outstation and in Australia (some of his friends who followed him to Christmas Island and Perth stayed back and are today citizens of Australia, living comfortably). He tried his hands at farming, cooking and mining jobs as well as sea fishing. It was not easy for him, being away from us but he was clever at hiding it. Eldest brother was encouraged to follow him to Kota Kinabalu where he learned the spray painting trade. Having saved some money he returned home after a few years to start his own spray painting business.

Dad more than made up for his absence from us by making frequent visits to our home in KL in later years. He would take bus rides from Malacca and walked to my wife’s kindergarten from the bus stop. At times he bought us fish or other meat and carried it all the way. He did his best at communicating with us all and was especially fond of the grand children. When he was with us, he would bring the kids for movies and occasional treats. His mobility was restrained in later years after sustaining a fall and as time progressed he had difficulty walking and remembering.

The last two years were particularly hard on him as he was less mobile and suffered poor health. I had always pictured him as a strong person both physically as well as mentally and had difficulty accepting his frail condition. In the week before his passing, eldest brother phoned me that dad asked for me. And so I visited him in hospital where we had to say our last farewell. Dad succumbed to his illness and passed on from this life on the 28th May 2009 at the age of 87. He brought us up well and we hope to live up to his good name. We have lost someone dear to us and shall miss him. Dad was laid to rest on the 1st June 2009. We cherish the memories of the time we shared together and will forever keep him in our hearts.

I would like to convey my appreciation for the many condolences, words of comfort, prayers, flowers, messages and visits by relatives, brethren and friends during the period of bereavement. Thank you all for your kind concern and thoughtfulness. The outpouring of love has helped to lighten our grief and sorrow.